I am trying to find a term/word for the phrase "If you do not go, I will not go" in the context of trying to put pressures on others to attend events. I have begun to hear this heavily as we approach Christmas and am curious, is this technically a related form of Extortion? I am not sure what is a good place to ask this, so apologies in advance if this doesn't belong here, but I am looking for a dictionary term/word that describes this.

Wikipedia's definition of Extortion is "...a criminal offense of obtaining money, property, or services from an individual or institution, through coercion." Technically attendance could be seen as a service, and it could be coercion if you feel pressured to do something for fear of social rejection, but I don't think this is a criminal offense and seems too negative a term to explain it.

Am I stretching here? FYI not looking for legal advice or anything, just curious from a language stand point for sake of arguments with friends, etc. I imagine there is probably a far better, less negative/illegal term for this.

  • "Extortion" is probably hyperbole...
    – Rob_Ster
    Commented Dec 6, 2017 at 17:36
  • Like I said I know that is not the term which is why I am asking for a proper terminology. What I am trying to say is Blackmail/Extortion is the only thing I know of that speaks negatively about presenting a repercussion for not acting in a way someone else wants you to. But the accepted answer is right, it is definitely Peer-Pressure.
    – Nate
    Commented Dec 6, 2017 at 17:44

1 Answer 1


You are possibly thinking of Peer Pressure which is influence felt from your immediate circle of [peers] friends, acquaintances etc.

Janice succumbed to her friends insistent demands to go out for a drink that night.

In the example, Janice didn't want to go out for a drink but after a certain amount of pressure from her peers she agreed to do so.

  • That makes sense, I accepted the answer since I am going outside the bounds of this site, but I am curious if there is a categorical difference between your example and the fact that "If you don't go, I will not go" provides a clear repercussion, similar to how: "I really would like you to give me money" is different from "Give me money or else I will tell x about y."
    – Nate
    Commented Dec 6, 2017 at 17:40

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