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Apparently, the text in bold of following sentence uses either inconsistent or incorrect punctuation/sentence formation:

The designer envisions the game's fundamental elements: the settings, characters, and plots that make each game unique, and is thus a primary force behind a video game.

When I first saw it and even after two or three rounds of evaluation, I still struggle to see any inaccuracy or inconsistency. Any ideas as to why this is the case?

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    What is "a primary force" in that sentence referring to? The designer himself, or something in that list?
    – Andrew Leach ♦
    Commented Sep 3, 2016 at 14:17
  • @Andrew Leach The "primary force" refers to the game designer's ability to envision the various elements (as listed in the sentence) of the game that he's about to design.
    – tsp216
    Commented Sep 3, 2016 at 14:19
  • That may be what you would like the primary force to refer to -- but it doesn't. You can't just plop a phrase in your sentence and have it relate to something unsaid in some sort of Zen way.
    – aparente001
    Commented Sep 4, 2016 at 3:38

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As "and is thus a primary force behind a video game." appears to be a continuation of "The designer envisions the game's fundamental elements", the latter is a sentence fragment.

Never use a colon after a sentence fragment.

http://www.quickanddirtytips.com/education/grammar/colons

An alternative might be:

The designer envisions the game's fundamental elements – the settings, characters, and plots that make each game unique – and is thus a primary force behind a video game.

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  • The alternative you proposed is actually perfectly correct, apparently
    – tsp216
    Commented Sep 3, 2016 at 14:25
  • How do you know? Do you have some software checking it?!
    – Řídící
    Commented Sep 3, 2016 at 14:26
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    ^ The question I posted comes from a practice paper of an exam I'm preparing for. The alternative proposed above is the correct answer, according to the solution sheet.
    – tsp216
    Commented Sep 3, 2016 at 14:31
  • @user98937 I'm still having the same trouble to which Andrew Leach referred. That is, who is the "primary force"? I'm not clear. Is it "the designer"? Or is it what the designer "envisions"? Whichever way I don't believe it makes grammatical sense. Were I writing it I think I would put a full stop afterunique, and make the final clause into a separate sentence with an identified subject.
    – WS2
    Commented Sep 3, 2016 at 14:41
  • @WS2 'is' refers to something singular. That leaves the designer (or unlikely: the/each game). Everything else is plural.
    – Řídící
    Commented Sep 3, 2016 at 14:44

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