I’m writing a book where in the beginning, we’re introduced to the couple by a conversation they’re having. I’m wondering how I can phrase it correctly?

"It's like I don't even know you anymore, Warren! You talk about doing big things, but when push comes to shove, you always find a way to let people down... and I'm tired of being let down. I love you Warren, I do. But I'm just not sure I want to be let down anymore. You're not the same person." [said Nastia at the dinner table].

I just don’t feel like it makes sense to start a new sentence with said. What are some suggestions?

  • Donlt use “saids” at all. “I love you too Nastia (that establishes her as the speaker) , but...” then have them say something else to put them at the dinner table “is that why you made this elaborate meal, to tell me you want a divorce?” – Jim Aug 7 '15 at 14:49
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    This seems like asking for writing advice though and probably needs to be closed or migrated. – Jim Aug 7 '15 at 14:52

Instead of using "said Nastia", you could include a different action. By placing it in the same paragraph as the quote, it's implied that the speaker is the one acting.


"You're not the same person." Nastia folded her napkin neatly and stared at her untouched plate.

  • But thinking of that, how would I continue her dialogue? Would I just put the quotes back up? That's the tricky part for me. I'm used to writing screenplays, so the formatting was very different. – Mike Kuplevatsky Aug 7 '15 at 14:33
  • Monologue: yes. Dialogue new paragraph and then open quotes. – Hugh Aug 7 '15 at 14:36
  • Wouldn't the reader get confused as to who is speaking though? How would I end what she has to say? Always by an action? It's a bit tricky for me, I used to love writing but stopped years ago. – Mike Kuplevatsky Aug 7 '15 at 14:38
  • 'Voicing' is the technique of fleshing out a character through vocabulary and phraseology. Voicing can be used to distinguish the two. – Hugh Aug 7 '15 at 16:45

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