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So I know that one loses self-control, but what if you mean to say that someone is responsible for that? Which verb would be OK to use?

Perhaps:

You disturb my self-control.
You shake my self-control.
You take my self-control.
You vex my self-control.

I can't find any instances of the first or last and only a couple of the second example. I found a lot of accounts using take, but it's part of a song so that taints the results. What sounds most natural?

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Of your examples, disturb and shake seem most natural. Take sounds incorrect and vex is usually applied to people, not virtues. We usually talk about a test of self-control (or a test of willpower), so I would choose test, strain, or try.

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  • ‘Take’ sounds incorrect? Tell that to Laura Branigan—in fact, perhaps because of the fame of that song, that was the one that sounded most natural to me (and the one I thought of before even opening the question). ‘Disturb’ and ‘shake’ sound fine, too, of course, but less final than ‘take’: if your self-control is disturbed or shaken, you still have self-control, just less of it. If it is taken, you have no self-control left at all.
    – Janus Bahs Jacquet
    Commented Aug 1, 2013 at 14:30
  • @JanusBahsJacquet: I’d never heard the song, so maybe we’re both biased. Take makes sense, thinking about it, but it sounds more like a poetic version of “make me lose” than something you’d use in conversation.
    – Jon Purdy
    Commented Aug 1, 2013 at 16:39
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Perhaps: You tax my self control.

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You can apply some self-control You can lose your self-control You can exercise some self-control

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You can say, “You make me lose my self-control.”

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  • ok but let's say that's not an option... is there another verb that could fit?? thanks
    – dingo
    Commented Aug 1, 2013 at 8:46

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