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Is there a word (or short phrase) that can be used for the feeling that accompanies the death of (a) hope? Specifically for something long term, like in a failing relationship or other similar loss (friends, jobs, etc.), where there might be multiple "hopes" that can die independently.

I do not feel that "Impending demise" or similar expressions are right, because they are more logical projections, rather than the actual emotion that is felt as a result. Dread also is not correct, because dread implies a fear that is not meant to be present in this usage - the emotion is more of a neutral/muted emption.

Sample:

As I sat there watching my girlfriend stew in anger, I felt ____ as I realized once again that we were probably heading for a breakup.

This feeling is not about the hope being gone, but more about having had a lot of hope before, and now there is not as much and one more hope just died.

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  • Despair won't do it for you? (I think you're too good for her anyway.)
    – deadrat
    Commented Dec 2, 2016 at 8:13
  • @deadrat Despair could work, but its definition says there is no hope left. The feeling I am trying to describe is not total despair, but a little before that point where a ray of hope was just snuffed, but there are still a few more left.
    – Emerson
    Commented Dec 2, 2016 at 9:00
  • On the brink of despair, then?
    – m.a.a.
    Commented Dec 2, 2016 at 9:25
  • I felt resignation as I realised ...
    – k1eran
    Commented Dec 2, 2016 at 12:26

3 Answers 3

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I felt resignation as I realized once again that we were probably heading for a breakup.

resignation
[mass noun] The acceptance of something undesirable but inevitable: ‘a shrug of resignation’

Origin
Late Middle English: via Old French from medieval Latin resignatio(n-), from resignare unseal, cancel (see resign).
https://en.oxforddictionaries.com/definition/resignation

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1

I don't know of a word that exactly captures what you're looking for. The obvious choices--despondent, despairing, forlorn, hopeless, disconsolate--don't quite achieve your intent. Best bet, in my opinion, would be just to add a qualifier of some sort, i.e.:

  • As I sat there watching my girlfriend stew in anger, I felt that familiar sense of hopelessness as I realized once again that we were probably heading for a breakup.
  • As I sat there watching my girlfriend stew in anger, the grip of my past despair again took hold as I realized we were probably heading for another breakup.
  • As I sat there watching my girlfriend stew in anger, I felt freshly forlorn as I realized once again that we were probably heading for a breakup.

Something along those lines perhaps.

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I would probably say 'Despair', or you can also use 'Agony'

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  • look for synonyms. words like Desolation and despondency can work as well
    – user208841
    Commented Dec 2, 2016 at 10:44
  • I like the word you proposed. Click on "edit" and add the definition, along with a link to an online definition.
    – aparente001
    Commented Dec 6, 2016 at 3:33

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