What is "immaculate English"?

Question

A row has broken out in London over a restaurant which stipulated in an advertisement for waiters that they should be able to speak "immaculate English".

Allegations ensued that this was a cover for excluding recent immigrants.

But on a different tack there is a letter in today's Observer asking Who speaks immaculately? The Oxford Dictionary on-line defines immaculate as perfectly clean, neat or tidy - as in "an immaculate white suit".

A number of questions arise. What is meant by immaculate English? Does Donald Trump, or Sadiq Khan, the new Mayor of London speak immaculate English? And what might have been a better term to use to describe the sort of English that would be desirable in a waiter?

But the most important question of all is whether the use of the term immaculate is in fact a euphemism for excluding people on a racist basis? Is it?

Answer 1

It's a figurative use. Immaculate means spotless, perfectly clean, without blemish or stain, so immaculate English means the language spoken without the "stain" of ungrammatical or improper usage.

The phrase has an in-built fallacy, namely that there is some standard by which it's possible to judge "perfect" (or "spotless", if you prefer) English. There isn't.

The kind of English I would find desirable in a waiter is fluent, vernacular English. I would also prefer that my waiter not introduce himself by name, tell me that he'll "be taking care of me", or respond to my order by saying, "Awesome!" But that's just me.

If you want to know whether the term immaculate is a euphemism, you'll have to ask the restaurant owner. People suspect an ulterior motive for two reasons:

1. Good waiters have been speaking less-than-perfect English for years. If you're really worried about the service at your restaurant, why would you impose an unnecessary requirement?
2. The diction, usage, and accent of recent immigrants has long been a common basis for derision and exclusion.