There's definitely some disagreement about the definitions of sympathy and empathy, and which of the two connotes a closer emotional connection, at least between Merriam-Webster and other dictionaries. I think this confusion is because sympathy has multiple definitions:
- feeling the same emotions as someone else, especially if you are or have been similarly personally affected
- feeling pity
- understanding or agreement
whereas empathy only has one definition:
- feeling the same emotions as someone else
Essentially, empathy is one of the definitions of sympathy. However, since empathy more unambiguously means "feeling the same emotions as someone else", it seems that the first definition of sympathy here is in decline, because people might think you mean a distant feeling of pity, and if you mean putting yourself in someone else's shoes, wouldn't you just say empathy?
Merriam-Webster says
Sympathy, constructed from the Greek "sym," meaning together, and "pathos," referring to feelings or emotion, is used to describe when one person shares the same feelings of another, such as when someone close is experiencing grief or loss. Empathy is a newer word also related to "pathos," but there is a greater implication of emotional distance. With "empathy" you can imagine or understand to how someone might feel, without necessarily having those feelings yourself.
Dictionary.com, however, says
Nowadays, sympathy is largely used to convey commiseration, pity, or feelings of sorrow for someone else who is experiencing misfortune. This sense is often seen in the category of greeting cards labeled “sympathy” that specialize in messages of support and sorrow for others in a time of need. You feel bad for them … but you don’t know what it is like to be in their shoes.
empathy […] is now most often used to refer to the capacity or ability to imagine oneself in the situation of another, experiencing the emotions, ideas, or opinions of that person.
sympathy is feeling compassion, sorrow, or pity for the hardships that another person encounters. […] empathy is putting yourself in the shoes of another, which is why actors often talk about it.
Lexico says something similar:
Empathy means ‘the ability to understand and share the feelings of another’ (as in both authors have the skill to make you feel empathy with their heroines), whereas sympathy means ‘feelings of pity and sorrow for someone else's misfortune’ (as in they had great sympathy for the flood victims)
Lexico provides the following definitions (abridged):
sympathy:
- feelings of pity and sorrow for someone else's misfortune.
- understanding between people; common feeling.
- [example sentence] ‘He listens politely and patiently to Dabii's request, with a smile of sympathy and understanding.’
The second definition here sounds a lot like empathy.
For sympathy, Merriam-Webster adds the definition
the act or capacity of entering into or sharing the feelings or interests of another / the feeling or mental state brought about by such sensitivity
Lexico defines empathy simply as
The ability to understand and share the feelings of another.
Merriam-Webster defines it as:
the action of understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, and vicariously experiencing the feelings, thoughts, and experience of another of either the past or present without having the feelings, thoughts, and experience fully communicated in an objectively explicit manner
