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A word for being troubled at others' potential schadenfreude against me

This is the ability to laugh at others' misfortune. What word would you use if you knew that your misfortune was causing others to laugh at you? Example; standing huddled in the rain to have a cigarette, knowing that your friends are inside in the warm.

marked as duplicate by Matt E. Эллен, mplungjan, Barrie England, MetaEd, Mitch Nov 20 '12 at 16:17

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I hesitate to offer this word as it is neither an antonym nor an inverse.

sardonic (adjective)

characterized by bitter or scornful derision; mocking; cynical; sneering

(from Dictionary.com)

"As the rain progressed from a drizzle to downpour, Bill nursed his cigarette with sardonic bitterness. He knew his non-smoking friends were surreptitiously watching him from the warm, dry, fourteenth floor."

This would work if Bill had a sense of self-relief in his friends' schadenfreude.

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