I see this most often with people who've owned houses for a long time, talking to young people who are seeking to buy. They have a sense of scarcely controlled glee for themselves as they describe how much their house has appreciated, but at the same time feel pity as they describe the situation, for the person who is trying to navigate today's housing market. I have not been able to find such a word. Any ideas would be welcome, even from other languages, a la schadenfreude (this is not schadenfreude because they take no pleasure in the other person's difficulty or misery).
Generically... feeling glee for myself due to a situation that is causing discomfort or misery for another, but towards whom they have no ill will. Maybe the situation is admission to a private school, obtaining a degree in a difficult major while describing this to someone who is struggling in that/those tasks.
I've tried Googling "feeling gleeful for myself but feeling pity for you" but no luck.
Edit to provide sample sentence use:
- "Edwin related the story of how he purchased his house in 1972 which had appreciated 20x [in this manner: feeling scarcely controlled glee for himself but pity for the listener] to his financially stretched young coworker who was unable to win any house bidding wars."
- "Steve related to his nephew the story of how he worked hard to get his degree at the elite school [in this manner: feeling glee for himself but pity for his nephew], while his nephew struggled."
- "Dave talked about all the enjoyable years he spent at the highly selective Davidson Prep [in this manner: feeling glee for himself but pity for his neighbor] to his neighbor whose son was having difficulty getting in anywhere."