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Is it possible to use the word lady instead of miss to show respect? And if I use it in front of a name, should I capitalize the word lady? For example, lady Mary Jane or Lady Mary Jane?
I know that 'Lady' is used this way with the names of female members of the nobility. But if it's not a noblewoman, and I just need to show respect, is it correct?
No, you can't. Titles have long histories, and Lady has the established meaning of a woman among the nobility of nations which respect hereditary titles. When referring to a woman who is not part of the nobility of such a nation, prefer the most applicable title, e.g., Ms., Mrs., Dr., PhD, etc. for formal correspondence.
In spoken language, people might use "lady" instead of "miss" as a respectful form of address to an unknown (typically older) woman: e.g. "excuse me, lady, do you know what time it is?" instead of "excuse me, miss, ..."
However, both of these usages are old-fashioned and might be considered mildly offensive (especially when used as a form of address). Using it indirectly as a synonym for "woman" ("I saw a lady cross the street") is still old-fashioned, but less potentially problematic. In my ear it also sounds class-laden - the way a working class male (taxi driver, construction worker, etc.) would speak to an (unknown) upper class woman.
"Ma'am" (short for "madam", the female equivalent of "sir") would be less old-fashioned, although still a bit awkward - this also avoids the difficulty of categorizing the unknown person as young/unmarried ("miss") vs older ("lady"). To be honest, if I have to address an unknown woman I would probably avoid the problem entirely and address her directly. ("Excuse me, do you know what time it is?")
