I am looking for an elegant expression, or better a word, to describe emotional arrival, to be settled down spiritually, to have come home in a sense that you know what you want, you are at peace with yourself, that kind of thing.

I'm a German native speaker, and in German this would be 'angekommen sein' (direct translation: 'to have been arrived')

Is there a quick and elegant way to say this?

  • As an aside, the loan translation 'I have arrived' in this metaphorical sense has the meaning, not of spiritual attainment, but of social or economic success. "Once I was nominated for the Academy Award for 2nd Key Grip, I really knew I had arrived." (and importantly this phrasing would not work at all for spiritual/emotional success)..
    – Mitch
    Commented Jun 17, 2020 at 17:49
  • 1
    @Mitch True, that's what got me thinking there has to be a better expression.
    – Ceron
    Commented Jun 17, 2020 at 18:12
  • Do you want an adjective, a verb, or a noun? Just saying "a word to describe" doesn't make that clear. Commented Jun 17, 2020 at 23:41

2 Answers 2


How about come into one's own? From The Free Dictionary:

come into one's own: to become independent; to be recognized as independent and capable, usually after much effort or time.

  • That's beautiful, thank you very much. Simple and elegant. Let's see what the rest of the community comes up with, but I'll mark this as answer :)
    – Ceron
    Commented Jun 17, 2020 at 18:09
  • @Ceron Thanks. :-) Commented Jun 17, 2020 at 18:27

There are multiple senses being asked for in the question. I will provide an expression that satisfies the following:

You know what you want, you are at peace with yourself.

comfortable in (one's) own skin

[The Free Dictionary]
Displaying a relaxed confidence in and clear understanding of oneself and one's abilities, especially when presenting oneself to or interacting with other people.

Though his girlfriend's group of friends are all older and more established in life, he is comfortable enough in his own skin to have no problem mingling with them at parties.

Janet is so comfortable in her own skin that I have no doubt that she'll find her ideal path in life.

From "Comfortable in Your Own Skin" by Risë Rafferty:

What does it mean to be comfortable in your own skin?

What does that look like? I recently asked these questions to my youth Sabbath school class. We briefly remembered awkward adolescent stages of our lives in which we weren’t so comfortable and then pondered its definition in the word and in the lives of people we know.

Some of the definitions the class threw out were:

  • don’t want to change anything about yourself
  • comfortable to be and express what is on our minds
  • don’t care about what people think
  • non-conforming to other people’s standards
  • humble
  • healthy self-confidence
  • unafraid to be uniquely ourselves without conforming to another's idea of who we should be

From "How to Feel More Comfortable in Your Own Skin" by Margarita Tartakovsky:

We become truly comfortable in our own skin when we accept ourselves—even the dark spots we don’t want others to see, said Ahmadinia, who specializes in mindfulness, stress and trauma at the West Los Angeles VA. We “see ourselves completely, as we are, without trying to avoid, run away or resist.”

From "How to Feel Comfortable in Your Own Skin" by Mary Dunlop:

Take time out to nurture your spirit, whether that means practicing yoga, walking on the beach, or simply relaxing. In order to be comfortable with yourself, you first need to be comfortable just being.

From "How to Become Comfortable in Your Own Skin" by David B. Bohl:

Other tips: stay positive and active. Simplify your life. Regain control over your hectic schedule. When we set our day’s goals and focus on a greater meaning and purpose for our lives, we are on our way to true success: happiness. People who are genuinely happy feel at ease with others and comfortable in their own skin.

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