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I was writing the following sentence and I'm puzzled which one would be the correct sentence. In my humble opinion, the second sentence looks wrong as a comma is not required. The second part of the sentence "I received..," is an independent sentence, and it is better to use a conjunction like which, or that, or maybe a comma is not required at all.

  1. I am writing this letter to express my dissatisfaction on the laptop repair service I received from you service center.

  2. I am writing this letter to express my dissatisfaction on the laptop repair service, I received from you service center.

  3. I am writing this letter to express my dissatisfaction on the laptop repair service that I received from you service center.

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  • 2nd version is correct apart from replacing "on" with "with". "_ ... my dissatisfaction with the laptop repair service that I received from ..._". You don't really need the "that" either. "I am writing this letter to express my dissatisfaction with the laptop repair service I received from you service center."
    – Peter Jennings
    Jul 5, 2019 at 16:47
  • also your service center
    – Henry
    Jul 5, 2019 at 18:17
  • Avoid saying “the below X” because this can sound stilted and even borderline unnatural to native speakers. Instead say “the following X” in especially formal written contexts, or merely “this X” in the singular or “these Xes” in the plural in many common and less exacting circumstances. Sometimes English-language learners don’t realize that they should use the demonstrative determiners this, that, these, those which native speakers customarily use for these cases.
    – tchrist ♦
    Jan 25, 2020 at 17:32

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There is no need for a comma in this sentence. However, the section from 'I received..." onward is not an independent sentence; in fact, "the laptop repair service I received from your service center" is a noun phrase, so there is no benefit to putting a comma in to break it up. You could say 'that I received', or (better in my opinion) 'which I received...', but sentence 1 as it stands (with the addition of the final r on 'your') is perfectly intelligible.

And I'd definitely say 'dissatisfaction with...'

With my editor's hat on, I might suggest recasting the sentence to make it pithier:

"I am writing this letter to express my dissatisfaction. Recently, I took my laptop in to your service centre..."

But that's style, not grammar.

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