I want to sign off a letter with the following:
Head of Accounting
Is this correct usage? Isn’t this like having 2 salutations? Is it ok to have 2 salutations?
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Use “we remain” in a participial closing¹. It provides the object (we) of the preceding participial phrase.
Here is an example of correct usage. I have added a sample participial phrase, and removed the comma after “remain”.
Letter text. Hoping this banal participial closing causes no offense, we remain Sincerely yours, Mr Person Head of Accounting
All authorities advise against the participial closing, but not on grammatical grounds. It is deprecated only because it weakens the letter.
Some expressions with "We remain" at the end of the sentence :
Hoping to receive the goods without delay, I am,
WILLIAM L. MILLER.
Hoping that my order may receive your usual prompt attention, I am,
HENRY M. BARROWS.
Hoping that the goods may prove satisfactory, and that we may be favored with further orders, we remain,
SIBLEY, DUDLEY & CO.
Thanking you for your promptness in filling my order, I am,
Awaiting further favors, we are,
Very truly yours,
DODGE, HOLMES & CO.
This ending evolved as a mannered construction in a mannered age, generally used with extreme politesse but particularly useful when grovelling was in order. It could also drip with irony which was very useful at a time or in circumstances when diplomatic or social niceties didn't allow for frank speech. I've always found it to be a delightful turn of phrase but one which now must be used very advisedly, generally in a light or humorous context.
In appreciation of your enlightening comments, I remain...
The forms shown above are traditional forms and are still perfectly acceptable. Modern casual and business forms are more succinct: the opening salutation and the closing valediction are brief, formulaic, and entirely independent of the sentences in the body text, each of which is complete in itself:
Dear Mr. Smith:
The firm that I represent has paid you the agreed sum foe the delivery of the materials itemized on the attached invoice. The firm has not yet received the expected supplies. Please see that the goods are delivered immediately.
That said, the more traditional form has a certain elegance and if it is not overdone won't come across as particularly strange.
In a personal letter, the greeting might vary more, and ends in a comma rather than a colon. Additionally, valedictions other than "sincerely" are more common in personal writing. The initial word of each paragraph is indented in personal letters. I expect, depending on the audience, the more prosy traditional form might be more appreciated in a personal letter.
In a business letter, the above form is normal and expected. Anything else will produce neutral results at best. The form is to start Dear So-and-so: and to close Sincerely, XYZ. The paragraphs are separated by spaces but are not indented.