1

Context from a video: After Moses led the Israelites out of Egypt, God decreed the laws and commandments, which guided the Israelites' life on earth and taught people how to worship God. These laws and commandments not only guided the Israelites, but informed and provided a standard for the creation of the constitutions of generations to come, laying a foundation for legal systems of future mankind.

I want to raise questions based on these passages in the context, and make it as an ad to attract the audience. But I don't know how to make the two sentences more coherent and sounds logical. (ps: I must include "the first part of each sentence")

  1. Now we live in a well-ordered society. Where do today’s legal systems originate?

  2. Now the society we live in is orderly/in good order. Do you know the reason behind this?

  3. Now we're living in a well-ordered society. Do you know how it can be so orderly?

  4. Now we're living in a well-ordered society. Do you know where today’s legal systems originate?

  5. Now we're living in a well-ordered society. Do you know who set the order / know who laid the foundation for its legal systems?

Which one is natural, coherent, better?

As an audience, before you watch the video, which ad attracts you most or can make you have more desire to watch the video?

If none of them is okay, please do some corrections.

  • Welcome Megan. Your question is basically asking for writing advice. This is sort of question is off-topic here because is is basically asking for opinions. This site is geared towards questions and answers for which there are authoritative sources such grammar books and dictionaries. Please take the site tour. It will help you get a feel for what we do here. – Phil Sweet Oct 20 '18 at 15:22
  • I don't know where to ask this kind of question. I hope someone could give me some advice – Megan Lee Oct 20 '18 at 15:57
  • 1
    The question "which ad attracts you most or can make you have more desire to watch the video" is opinion based, and there is no site on Stack Exchange that would take it. How to make it "more coherent and sound logical" sounds like it's also too opinion based, or it's proofreading and proofreading is also off-topic unless you can identify a specific word or phrase that you think is problematic and show your research into solving the problem. Hopefully that makes sense. – Laurel Oct 20 '18 at 16:31

Your Answer

By clicking “Post Your Answer”, you agree to our terms of service, privacy policy and cookie policy

Browse other questions tagged or ask your own question.