Comedian Bob Newhart uses to tell only one side of a conversation in his routines.

In his routine "Ledge Psychology", (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MwXaTy0PMPw , at 3:30 min) , in which a police officer tries to talk someone out of jumping from a ledge on a sky scraper in Chicago, at one time the police officer calls down to Sam, the hot dog man, and orders two hot dogs. The hot dog man asks an (untold) question, and the police officer answers "No, no, to go!", which seems to be the point of a joke.

Now I know the meaning of "to go", since it is used in my language as well, but I'd like to know how you could express its opposite, so that it becomes funny in that context?

  • Reminds me of a verse from Emo Philips' Downtown Downers Grove: "I went into Gus's Artificial Organ and Taco Stand / Said, "Give me a bladder, por favor" / The guy said, "Is that to go?" / I said, "Well, what else would I want it for?"
    – MT_Head
    Jul 3, 2018 at 18:36
  • The question, as it is posed, is just a POB issue.
    – user 66974
    Jul 3, 2018 at 18:41
  • 1
    In the context of Bob Newhart's monologue, the joke is that the guy who is contemplating jumping from the ledge won't want to "eat it [the hot dog] here"—he'll want to take it with him when he jumps. Hence, "to go."
    – Sven Yargs
    Jul 3, 2018 at 21:28

1 Answer 1


In that context, I would say:

No, not to go! For here!


Make mine 'for here'. [pause] Hold on, I'll check.

That's an attempt at humor, at least. I don't guarantee it will actually get any laughs. I am not Bob Newhart, after all.

  • Since there are significant geographical variations, I think you should specify where you hear those expression used.
    – user 66974
    Jul 3, 2018 at 18:33
  • @user110518, The OP asked about creating a "funny" response using the opposite of "to go". I don't believe that question lends itself to an exhaustive answer.
    – ScottM
    Jul 3, 2018 at 18:35
  • I think "Hold on, I'll check" is just about perfect for the situation - even funnier than Newhart's original, if that isn't blasphemy.
    – MT_Head
    Jul 3, 2018 at 18:38
  • Thanks, I think probably "for here" should be what was suggested by the hot dog man, since that would imply that the man on the ledge had to jump down to the hot dog man in order to get his hot dog, and the policeman would try to prevent that.
    – hbarck
    Aug 5, 2018 at 13:23

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