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Our monetisation strategy focuses on feeds advertisement, the effect of which has been recognised by advertisers. We are optimistic about attaining our 6 billion revenue goal for this year.

I feel the clause " the effect of which has been recognised by advertisers" is a bit weird, though it is grammatically correct. How can I reorganise these two sentences and improve their structure?

  • Why don't you remove the clause entirely? – Roddy of the Frozen Peas Aug 25 '16 at 12:13
  • Because I have to include the information in this paragraph. – Mandy Aug 25 '16 at 12:21
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Sounds like the main thrust of the section is explaining your monetization strategy and the financial efficacy of it. The advertisers are the source of your money, and you want to just make a parenthetical remark about them. So maybe something like:

Our monetization strategy focuses on feed advertisements (as strongly felt by our advertisers). With already positive results in H2, we are on track to reach our $6 billion revenue goal for the year.

It's always better to be more specific in this type of communication. So I just made up some scenarios you could think about.

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Our monetisation strategy focuses on feeds advertisement of recognized impact. We are optimistic about attaining our 6 billion revenue goal for this year.

It is implicit that the impact is recognized by the advertisers.

Could use demonstrated in place of recognized.

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It’s not easy to see how such disparate thoughts go together but if they must: Advertisers having recognised the effect of our monetisation strategy, which focuses on feeds advertisement, we are optimistic about attaining our 6 billion revenue goal for this year.

If the effect belongs to the advertisement, not the strategy: Advertisers having recognised our monetisation strategy through the effect of feeds advertisement on which it focuses, we are optimistic about attaining our 6 billion revenue goal for this year.

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