There is a word that means to offer to be in a relationship. For example, it could be used in the following dialogue:

A: Let's go over to my apartment.
B: Are you [] me?

However, I can't think of this word. Any help?

  • 12
    Rather than an offer to be in a relationship, it sounds like something else :D eheheh
    – Alenanno
    Jul 1, 2011 at 8:24
  • 1
    @Ham and Bacon: ?
    – Alenanno
    Jul 1, 2011 at 8:49
  • 9
    @sdsf, your conversation example does not really illustrate typical scenario where a relationship is discussed.
    – Unreason
    Jul 1, 2011 at 8:53
  • 2
    In this facebook age, I think that is 'friending' Jul 1, 2011 at 15:34
  • 2
    @Ham Do you mean Are you trying to get with me? That would make more sense.
    – Kit Z. Fox
    Jul 1, 2011 at 16:18

7 Answers 7


The first word that springs to mind is proposition, as in

Are you propositioning me?

That would generally imply sex rather than necessarily a longer relationship, but that would seem to fit your example dialogue :-)

Other possible words include: seduce, woo, pursue.

  • Nice one. Sounds a bit formal though
    – Thursagen
    Jul 1, 2011 at 8:24
  • 25
    Never end a sentence with a proposition ;)
    – mplungjan
    Jul 1, 2011 at 9:31
  • 1
    Proposition is rarely used in the active voice...
    – Jimi Oke
    Jul 1, 2011 at 12:38
  • 1
    @Jimi I think the only time I hear "propositioning" is in this exact context. @psmears I think the equivalent is "Are you asking to have sexual relations with me?" so it's not at all about a longer relationship, but I agree that is fits the dialogue best. It's what immediately popped into my mind when I read it.
    – Kit Z. Fox
    Jul 1, 2011 at 13:13
  • 10
    To those non-native speakers who might be inclined to try to use these terms, 'proposition' and 'seduce' might actually be used, but sounds like a movie script (as in not really an accurate view of reality); if used, they really might be considered too presumptuous. 'Woo', on the other hand, no one would ever dare utter in those circumstances, except possibly by someone with a psychosis brought on by an overdose of Wodehouse novels...sorry, novels read by characters in Wodehouse novels.
    – Mitch
    Jul 1, 2011 at 14:06

I usually use: Are you hitting on me? :-)

  • 5
    Congratulations! You maxed out your daily rep on your very first answer!
    – John Y
    Jul 1, 2011 at 19:14

For an option which is slightly less sexual than proposition or hitting on, you might say:

Are you coming on to me?

Where to come on to someone means to flirt and entice someone, without necessarily implying that you're asking for a sexual act, which is what to proposition implies.

  • 3
    "Flirting" might be even better (less sexual connotation that "coming on" in my opinion). But the OP's word "relationship" suggests to me something more lasting than "flirting with" or "coming on to" or "hitting on" does.
    – LarsH
    Jul 1, 2011 at 14:56
  • You might say to her: " Would you tell your breasts to stop staring at my eyes?"
    – user3847
    Jan 11, 2015 at 17:00

Are you courting me?

This better implies seeking a relationship rather than just a sexual liaison. Though its use is kind of out of fashion.

Courting means "to woo; to attempt to win over with social activities and displays of tact and affection."

  • That's probably the most accurate word to fit what he's looking for. But nobody would ever say that out loud.
    – Ian Boyd
    Jul 3, 2011 at 12:43

Diggin. I think that you would want to know if they got your implication, and diggin is slang from the 60–70s.


Formally, when a man (or in recent times a woman) asks their love interest to become their spouse, that is a "propoosal", and the verb is "to propose". However, in modern times we would define that couple as being "in a relationship" long before it gets to this point.

Less formally, an implicit or explicit invitation from one person to another to have a romantic or sexual encounter is to "proposition" them; the term is officially a noun, but got "verbed" as many nouns implying an action tend to do. Again, this is normally between people who have at least some personal relationship prior to the invitation, but this relationship could be as short as a shared drink or two at a bar.

Other such terms, as stated in other answers, include "to seduce", "to come on to", "to hit on", "to dig on", "to flirt with", "to break the ice", etc. These all have the connotation of more or less an implied invitation to participate, and some are more innocent and/or introductory than others. You can "hit on" or "flirt with" total strangers with no serious invitation implied, depending on the social setting. "Seducing" a total stranger is possible, but nearly always implies a very serious invitation to romance.


I would say that the word "courting" is appropriate in your example.

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