Link to the wonderful song "Taboo" by Tim Minchin
I believe the best word would be "Reserved". Similar to the above video, there are words that are acceptably used in the average vernacular only by those of that subgrouping. It's not wholly based on sexual preferences or race (while the aforementioned words 'queer', 'Jew', 'white trash', 'nigger', 'cracker', & 'gay' all would certainly fall into that category) as you could include more socially normed terms would fall into that category.
Using House of Cards as an example (reflecting respect to real life presidents) Claire Underwood calls her husband "Francis", his friends call him "Frank", but those names are reserved for them - in any other context, to any other character he is Mr. President, or simply President Underwood, because they aren't allowed those reserved words.
Likewise, my children call variations of "Father" (including Dad, daddy, et cetera), but that term is reserved for them - Everyone else my proper name, or some variants thereof.
Something similar happened with the distinctions of people with disabilities. While it was, at one time, in the vernacular to refer to 'cripples', the 'deaf', the 'dumb', the 'retarded', that has since been swept away - first it was banded together with the umbrella word 'handicapped', then each individual group decided which word they wanted to use their own. The general word, even used by international consortium, is 'disabled people', but even that is being rebelled against recently with 'differently abled'.