What is the meaning of "Already wet, aren’t they? Little squirts!"?

Question

“Peeves, get down here NOW!” barked Professor McGonagall, straightening her pointed hat and glaring upward through her square-rimmed spectacles.

“Not doing nothing!” cackled Peeves, lobbing a water bomb at several fifth-year girls, who screamed and dived into the Great Hall. “Already wet, aren’t they? Little squirts! Wheeeeeeeeee!” And he aimed another bomb at a group of second years who had just arrived.

(p172, Harry Potter 4, US edition)

NB— Peeves is a mischievous ghost floating in the air.

I’ve lost track of the logical flow of ‘Already wet, aren’t they? Little squirts!’ There are some questions swirling in my mind: Who are they? Who is he talking to? What are little squirts (water bombs or children)?

I’d like to know the meaning and enjoy the lively atmosphere of the scene.

It’d be nice if you could help me!

Answer 1

First, some definitions:

• In UK slang, wet means weak, wimpy, pathetic, spineless. This sort of thing is (or was) commonly heard in schools:

  Don't be so wet!, or

  I can't believe you won't climb the wall with us. Girls are so wet!

• A little squirt is also slang: it's a mildly insulting term for a small, insignificant person (usually a child).

So, the quote: "Already wet, aren't they?" is playing on the two meanings of "wet" - they're already wet (spineless), so it doesn't matter if we get them wet (with water). (This is more likely than the pure literal interpretation of "wet", coming immediately after the stereotypically girly "wet" behaviour of screaming and running away - Peeves's comment is in direct response to this, hence the aren't they question tag.) And similarly the little squirts also refers to the girls, in a similar act of insulting wordplay (squirt=small person; squirt=jet of water).

Answer 2

It seems nobody has bothered to post the most obvious, and probably most likely, interpretation: already wet refers to the fact that it's pouring rain outside, so the girls — who just came from outside — are probably sodden; and little squirts is a mildly disparaging term for children, as well as being a slight play on words because squirt as a verb means to spray water.

(In case it's not obvious, both phrases refer to the girls, and Peeves is kind of talking to himself — narrating his own actions, as it were.)

There's really nothing all that complicated going on in this passage, language-wise. To call the peeing interpretation "far-fetched" is a massive understatement.

Answer 3

Well, as for the first part:

[The several fifth-year girls are] already wet, aren't they?

And squirt is slang for a small or insignificant person, but to squirt is to shoot water on, so there's a subtle play on words here.

Answer 4

They is referring to the girls. Already wet implies they have already wet themselves from fright, before being wet by the balloons. Little squirts is referring again to the girls but with a play on the word squirt which can mean both:

a thin stream or small quantity of liquid ejected from something

(like pee) and,

a person perceived to be insignificant, impudent, or presumptuous

There is another play on Wheeeeeeeeee!, too, which can be an exclamation of delight as well as:

wee-wee
a child's word for urine

^{blockquotes from NOAD}