2

I have a pretty loaded sentence with numerous commas and I am not sure whether the comma usage is appropriate.

"Pyrene was shown to bind weakly, and one of its derivatives, 1-aminopyrene, more strongly to THRA and THRB, using competitive binding immunoassays."

Can someone please assist?

I have recently adopted this style of writing, using multiple commas per sentence in order to load it with information. I am not English and I may be totally off track!

closed as primarily opinion-based by FumbleFingers, user140086, Mitch, Nathaniel, Jim Dec 20 '15 at 19:09

Many good questions generate some degree of opinion based on expert experience, but answers to this question will tend to be almost entirely based on opinions, rather than facts, references, or specific expertise. If this question can be reworded to fit the rules in the help center, please edit the question.

  • 2
    I would suggest that you not try to cram it all into one sentence. – Hot Licks Dec 20 '15 at 14:23
  • 2
    Using competitive binding immunoassays it was shown that pyrene binds weakly to THRA and THRB, and that one of its derivatives, 1-aminopyrene, binds more strongly. – Edwin Ashworth Dec 20 '15 at 15:04
  • What Edwin A. says. Or, to keep the parallelism but make it marginally clearer, add even one more comma (and an expanded duplicated parallel): "Pyrene was shown to bind weakly, and one of its derivatives, 1-aminopyrene, to bind more strongly, to THRA and THRB, using competitive binding immunoassays. – Jeff Y Dec 20 '15 at 15:37
  • If you ask yourself that question, the sentence probably needs rewriting. – marw Dec 20 '15 at 19:49
1

Edwin Ashworth has provided the best answer so far this morning:

"Using competitive binding immunoassays it was shown that pyrene binds weakly to THRA and THRB, and that one of its derivatives, 1-aminopyrene, binds more strongly."

I'm assuming, of course, that Mr. Ashworth's re-writing does not change the meaning of what you wanted to say.

  • Thank you so much your response! Yes, the proposed sentence maintains the meaning, but makes more sense. Thank you! – Christoff Dec 20 '15 at 17:00

Not the answer you're looking for? Browse other questions tagged or ask your own question.