0

I searched online that the word that has a function of stress/emphasize.
And this usage comes up to my mind when designing for our company motto.
Is it proper here?


The colleague edition:

Two steps ahead to think and design in rapidly changing market
Solving problems instead of analysing difficulty
Working, sharing and studying in the elite team
Embrace the trial of business startups, total devotion
Only the best product that can survive

My edition:

Think two steps ahead than the market.
Solving problems instead of explaining.
Keep learning, share your experiences.
Embrace the challenge with fully devotion.
Only the best product can survive.

closed as off-topic by FumbleFingers, Edwin Ashworth, user140086, tchrist, MetaEd Nov 11 '15 at 18:20

This question appears to be off-topic. The users who voted to close gave this specific reason:

  • "Proofreading questions are off-topic unless a specific source of concern in the text is clearly identified." – FumbleFingers, Edwin Ashworth, Community, tchrist, MetaEd
If this question can be reworded to fit the rules in the help center, please edit the question.

  • 1
    This is proofreading, but I question the wisdom of attempting to create slogans/mottos in a foreign language (foreign to OP, I mean). – FumbleFingers Nov 11 '15 at 1:42
  • @FumbleFingers, the BOSS requires some international flavor, you know that. I gave the whole slogan just for context. If you think that's sort of abuse, I could withdraw the last paragraph. – Zen Nov 11 '15 at 1:45
  • 2
    This is far too long to be a motto or a slogan. This is more like a poem. – Matt Samuel Nov 11 '15 at 1:48
  • Or potentially 5 separate mottos (one motto per line) – Ben Nov 11 '15 at 1:55
  • 1
    And I would remove "that" whether its proper or in-proper on the premise that it sounds weird and makes less sense. – Ben Nov 11 '15 at 1:58
0

Honestly, this whole passage makes very little sense. Adding "that" seems unnecessary, as it doesn't make too much of a difference in how it reads.

Not the answer you're looking for? Browse other questions tagged or ask your own question.