I am hoping to get some help. I have always been told that I am the most sarcastic person people have ever met. After 20 years, I decided to dive a little deeper to see if I fit the definition. It turns out I do not fit the definition of sarcastic. I also don't fit any of the others either, such as: sardonic, dry sense of humor, snarky, etc.

I am very direct but not in a bossy way. For instance, when a co-worker snaps at me because of their mood, I will bring attention to it but not in an ugly way. An example:

ummmmm.....so not sure what's going on with allll THAT, but Ima need you to calm yourself before talking to me like that.

This, in turn, makes the co-worker laugh and recognize the way it came across. I always am direct, but I am direct in a way that makes others laugh and is not offensive.

I have been told many, many times that I say and get away with saying things that most would never even think of saying because of my personality. If others were to say the things I say, there would be a fight or trouble. However, when I say it, people laugh and "know my personality."

I would like to know what this would be called. I am never rude and never make someone feel bad. In fact, quite the opposite; those that are in a fowl mood usually lighten up.

This is how I am about 95% of the time. Other times (when I feel strongly about my position), I am direct and dead serious (but still not ugly).

Any help would be greatly appreciated!! A

  • It's called diplomacy/ tact.
    – Kris
    Feb 27, 2015 at 6:40
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    Winston S. Churchill — 'Diplomacy is the art of telling people to go to hell in such a way that they ask for directions.'
    – Kris
    Feb 27, 2015 at 6:41
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    You need to get health insurance so you could afford to go to a formally trained therapist. We are all quacks here, unqualified to treat your symptoms. Feb 27, 2015 at 7:47
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    You might be described as being "simpatico" (It's used in the US, am I right?) or charming. But without knowing you it's impossible to say for certain. Anyone who is simpatico can get away with almost anything in life because people find them so spontaneous, friendly and maybe even sincere.
    – Mari-Lou A
    Feb 27, 2015 at 11:28
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    "I have always been told that I am the most sarcastic person people have ever met." Impossible! I'm the most sarcastic person alive.
    – Hot Licks
    Feb 27, 2015 at 18:19

3 Answers 3


The phrase I would use for the combination of traits you describe is "disarmingly direct." The "direct" part you note yourself (four times) in the course of stating the question. But evidently the thing that sets your directness apart from, say, Alceste's (in Molière's The Misanthrope) is that you wield it in a way that lowers hackles instead of raising them. This gift, I think, is aptly characterized as being "disarming." Hence, "disarmingly direct."

  • Thanks for the answer, Sven! By the way, if I haven't mentioned it before, I'm very direct! :)
    – Amym
    Apr 10, 2015 at 0:59
  • the answer is correct - so tick it.
    – Fattie
    Jun 2, 2015 at 2:22

You're candid.

Synonyms include forthright and frank.

But candid is what you describe because it connotes sincerity and not bluntness, which many of the synonyms do imply. It's also not perceived as a negative personality trait.


I’ve been made to think I was sarcastic also until a couple of days ago I learned about the word candid. I feel that you may be candid too. It describes our personality to a “T”. Hope that helps.


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