When did "to forgive" lose its primary meaning for pardoning and become solely about an emotional response?

Question

During a recent debate I was having with a peer, I was shocked to find out that the word "forgive" no longer carries a primary association with the act of pardoning another individual (i.e., informally cancelling indebtedness or absolving deeds done). In fact, when I search both Google's and Oxford's websites, the definition (for both) is given as follows:

for•give

1. stop feeling angry or resentful toward (someone) for an offense, flaw, or mistake.
2. cancel (a debt).
3. used in polite expressions as a request to excuse or regard indulgently one's foibles, ignorance, or impoliteness.

Merriam-Webster's online dictionary is seemingly no better, offering this:

for•give

1. to stop feeling anger toward (someone who has done something wrong) : to stop blaming (someone)
2. to stop feeling anger about (something) : to forgive someone for (something wrong)
3. to stop requiring payment of (money that is owed)

In stark contrast, when I reference my 2001 version of Webster's Unabridged Dictionary of the English Language, I'm given this:

for•give

1. to grant pardon for or remission of (an offense, debt.,etc.); absolve.
2. to give up all claim on account of; remit {a debt, obligation, etc.).
3. to grant pardon to (a person).
4. to cease to feel resentment against: to forgive one's enemies
5. to cancel an indebtedness or liability of: to forgive the interest owed on a loan
6. to pardon an offense or an offender

So, if what appears to be a wild difference in usage/meaning has occurred over the past 13 years, I guess what I'm wondering is:

a) When did this happen?

b) Why did this happen?

c) Am I the only person who thinks this is crazy?

Answer 1

This answer will probably elicit scores of down-votes, but no matter.

I suggest the increasingly secular, post-Christian zeitgeist of recent history is at least partially to blame for the gradual erosion of the concept of forgiveness as a pardon for an offense--or even, gulp, a sin! I deplore this relatively recent trend.

As a Christian myself I identify strongly with that particular denotation of forgive, though I am not averse to linking the word forgive also to the cancelling of a debt and giving up any future claims on it. The two phenomena seem to be cut from the same piece of cloth.

The Bible is rife with teaching about (and illustrations of, and exhortations concerning) forgiveness. Jesus' exemplar of prayer includes the sentence,

"And forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors . . .."

Debts, of course, can also be translated trespasses, which generally speaking involve stepping over boundaries and into behaviors which are deemed to be unacceptable, immoral, and unethical. Metaphorically,to trespass is to go where one should not go, just as a hunter deliberately enters land which is posted "No Trespassing" or a a straying husband trespasses against his wife by seeking out the services of a prostitute.

There is a saying,

"To forgive is to forget."

I suggest that forgetting a trespass against us, whether an unkind word or insult, a lie, or even a person's refusal to forgive us, is humanly impossible. We can, however, choose to remember differently, which is really the hallmark of true forgiveness. When one is tempted to engage in "digging up bones, exhuming things that's better left alone," as the popular country song put it a few years ago, the best thing to do is to remind ourselves that the bones need to stay buried and not brought into the light again.

Put differently, to forgive is to refuse to rub a person's face in the trespass, even though we might be tempted to do so. To give in to the temptation is tantamount to taking revenge, which according Christian doctrine is the province of God, not human beings.

I guess you could say that to forgive someone from the heart involves an application of the so-called "Golden Rule"; namely, do unto others as you would like others to do unto you.