1

Never in her life had she seen such shocking footage, not to mention two in one day. The experience had shaken her like nothing before. But there was something else in them that had disturbed her. Something that still lingered in her mind, like the afterimage of a picture she had overlooked.

I thought of omitting the "there was" in the sentence above:

But something else in them had disturbed her.

Is that grammatically correct? Does the meaning change?

Improve this question
2
  • Looks fine to me. Proof reading is however off topic here – mplungjan Oct 9 '13 at 8:42
  • 1
    Yes. No. Short answer. – GreaseMonkey Oct 9 '13 at 8:46
4

The longer version emphasises the presence of ‘something else’. The shorter version emphasises her being disturbed.

Improve this answer

Your Answer

By clicking “Post Your Answer”, you agree to our terms of service, privacy policy and cookie policy

Not the answer you're looking for? Browse other questions tagged or ask your own question.