Remember that this is dialogue from a TV sitcom that runs for about 22 minutes with commercial breaks. The conversation needs to move quickly. The timing and rhythm of jokes is critical to the comedy. So the funny part with the word axe is at the end of the sentence for maximum punch. Also part of the joke is that Mike is very irresponsible so his dad is humorously willing to consider the idea that the potential for an axe murderer might be still be a better idea.

In addition to that, the whole horror genre was very much alive in the 1980s with Friday the 13th movies, for example, which would have made the axe murderer reference a lot more timely.

The literal answer is: No, we can't find a babysitter at the last minute -- at least not a good one.

Remember that this is dialogue from a TV sitcom that runs for about 22 minutes broken up into acts separated by commercials. The conversation needs to move quickly. The timing and rhythm of jokes is critical to the comedy. So the funny part, with the word axe, is at the end of the sentence for maximum punch. Also part of the joke is that Mike is very irresponsible so his dad is humorously willing to consider the idea that the potential for an axe murderer might be still be a reasonable idea since the kids could still run away.

In addition to that, the whole horror genre was very much alive in the 1980s with Friday the 13th movies, for example, which would have made the axe murderer reference a lot more timely.