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241

This is an old chemistry pun. The first scientist expected the exchange to go something like Scientist 1: I’d like some H₂O. Scientist 2: I’d like some H₂O, too. which would sound exactly the same as Scientist 2: I’d like some H₂O₂. H₂O₂ is the chemical formula for hydrogen peroxide, of which a glass would be highly toxic.


103

The joke is a play on words [Cambridge Dictionary] on various definitions of murder. A group of crows is called a murder. [Wikipedia] Two is not quite a group, hence an attempted murder. To further beat the joke to death, murder also means homicide, and attempted murder is a crime in British and United States' penal codes. The unusual combination of birds ...


45

As choster explained, this is a modification of a chemistry joke. I'd just like to add that this is an example of an anti-joke. An anti-joke is typically prepared and delivered in a similar fashion to a regular joke but the climax (the punchline) is realistic, disappointing or depressing. This can still be funny because it can still shock the listener. ...


43

They're puns pretending to be similes, which is part of the source of the humour. "Make like" is an American English expression that can mean "behave as though" ("He keeps making like he's the smartest guy in the class, though he's the only one that keeps failing") or "behave in the manner of" ("He camped it up and made like Diana Ross"). For that reason, ...


35

The pun is on 'couldn't (do something) to save his life'. Usually 'to save his own life' is used metaphorically, meaning that he couldn't do X very well. Except here the X, 'discovering a plot', is what he couldn't do and he literally could not save his own life because of it, the plot was to kill Caesar. As everyone else said, it's not a particularly ...


34

The punning here is obscene. It means If bang cock invaded your booty, would grease help? cock = penis booty = ass grease = lubricant


31

The passage is funny because the Mock Turtle acts as an authority figure but uses abnormal logic and reason. This pretense of authority and twisting of logic are ongoing motifs of Alice in Wonderland. By saying, "we called him Tortoise [ˈtʰɔː təs] because he taught us [ˈtʰɔt əs]", the Mock Turtle claims that this similarity of pronunciation is a valid ...


26

This is a pun that needs to be understood in its context. Although he was a Turtle, his pupils called him a Tortoise, because: 'We called him a Tortoise because he taught us!' said the Mock Turtle angrily: 'really you are....' It's a pun by Caroll. It seems that Americans don't get this pun, because the American pronunciation of "tortoise" differs ...


26

I cannot commend Jon Hanna's erudite answer too highly. I should like to add, however, that the form of the joke probably goes back to a slightly different slang phrase which surfaces in 1908. I first encountered this in two works I was very fond of in my childhood: Mr. Parker rose. "There's nothing more to be done then," he said. "Nothing," agreed ...


22

This isn’t really a joke as such, but it is a pun, centered around a not-often-seen meaning of the word Irish. The OED article on Irish has this in sense A.5.c (adj.): colloq. (somewhat offensive). Of a statement or action: paradoxical; illogical or apparently so. The speaker is presumably talking about boxing and thus a fist blow, but he measures its ...


16

The vast majority of times, "no pun intended" is used precisely to draw attention to the pun that was just made. Since the preceding pun may not be readily apparent, it can help the reader go back a few words and catch the pun. Personally I don't use this phrase much, but I'm not a very punny person. If you're actually afraid that something you wrote can ...


15

Tortoises are a species of turtle. A tortoise is a turtle. But a turtle is not explicitly a tortoise. In that respect they are the same. However, tortoises are land animals while turtles are amphibious. That's the major difference. Edit: The context above isn't making reference to the tortoise animal. They called him tortoise (pronounced "taught us") ...


12

read it as Seven ate Nine :)


12

A Purim Shpiel By Dan Silverman contains what is unequivocally a pun. Although able to build a profitable medical practice in Kingston’s Jewish quarter, Maimonides could not secure a congregation among the suspicious and inward-looking autochthonous Jewish settlement. He came to soft-peddle his rabbinical wares among the local infirm gentile population, ...


11

" He couldn't run to save his life;" "He couldn't swim to save his life;" morphed into such phrases as "He couldn't play bridge to save his life." "...fry eggs..." "...tie a reef knot..." Here R R finds himself using the phrase literally. I think that is the play on words that catches him by surprise, an informal phrase in a real context. ...


10

In this case, the meaning is ambiguous and could mean either of the two you suggested as nothing in the phrase specifies who will be making it. I originally read it as she was leaving to make the coffee, but both are equally plausible. Is there any extra context around it that would clarify? E.g. are they in a location where making coffee is possible?


10

I would suggest "Wazz salon" as in William Shakespeare and the Wazz Salon The pronunciation matches: From Wikipedia Oise (French pronunciation: ​[waz]) is a department in the north of France. It is named after the river Oise. The book is from Oct 1985 Wazz - Urinate - 1980s: origin uncertain; perhaps an alteration of whizz. ...


9

'Oxymoron' is probably the word you want.


8

I believe you're talking about a portmanteau, which is where parts of two different words (in this case, "bike" and "-kery", from "bakery") are combined to form a new word. There's a long list of these over on Wikipedia, including such words as "cyborg" ("cy-bernetic" + "org-anism"), "gaydar" ("gay" + "ra-dar"), and "mockumentary" ("mock" + "do-cumentary"). ...


8

You're correct that capitalizing Windows gives away the joke. Since the joke is the whole purpose of the sentence, leave it in lowercase. I'm sure everyone will forgive you for your laxness in the case of one proper noun. You should use the verb is because, in the end, the word windows should be understood to refer to the operating system. So it should be ...


8

The reader is expected to be familiar with this joke, which has seen a lot of popularity on the Internet on sites like reddit lately: The punchline here is that H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide, which can be poisonous if drunk.


8

The pun appears to reside in the fact that stone is a colloquial/slang term for 'testicle'. The essential meaning of the passage Some people admire that when the person offended had so fair and suitable opportunity, it did not enter his head to turn St-n-c-tt-r himself could therefore be rendered as Some people applaud him for not deciding to cut ...


8

Another consideration: instead of referring to to word plot, maybe he's referring to the idiom "to save his life." It's used to colorfully describe one's inability/incompetence with regard to the described action: It's like saying "He's so bad at X, that even if his life depended on his doing X, he still wouldn't be able to it adequately." It's a common ...


7

You won't find "eggscruciating" in a dictionary because it's a pun, "also called paronomasia, is a form of word play which suggests two or more meanings, by exploiting multiple meanings of words, or of similar-sounding words, for an intended humorous or rhetorical effect". For example: Atheism is a non-prophet institution. You can tune a guitar, but you ...


7

There are a few names for (rhetoric) vices that refer to using wrong words or wrong expressions at wrong places. You are probably looking for acyrologia, An incorrect use of words, especially the use of words that sound alike but are far in meaning from the speaker's intentions. Note: Malapropisms are a kind of acyrologia. or malapropism, A ...


7

It's grammatically correct, and a little humorous, but not a pun: a pun is generally a play on the sound or meaning of a word or phrase. What you wrote is effectively the same as saying: I think the last "valid" example is in fact not. Note the quotes (referring to the original post) and the use of a term such as "in fact" (showing contrast), both of which ...


7

Effervescent=If there isn't. Which should be: if there aren't.


6

Puns go way back to ancient Egypt, and are found in the bible, and as some of the earliest books translated into English, may well be the source of the "first pun in English". Beowulf Beowulf "is one of the very earliest poems in English and its first great literary masterpiece". It was written in Old English sometime between the 8th and 11th centuries. A ...


6

I find it an interesting question in the sense that it stretches the discussion of just what can and can't be verbed. I am unsure as to the exact evolution of the following, but it seems that "Do you drink coffee first thing in the morning" may have led to "Do you 'do' coffee first thing in the morning?", which would be understandable (even if quite ...


6

Your sentence is This is a ship-shipping ship, shipping shipping ships. The last shipping is an adjective, describing what kind of ships are being shipped. The second to the last shipping is the verb of that clause (the present participle of ship). It's not redundant*, as there are other kinds of ships. It could be rewritten (and keeping the meaning) ...



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