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Can I rephrase the following sentence with "however"

While application development approaches abound in the software world, the evaluation of the existing programming frameworks tend to focus on specific application context.

rephrase sentence :

The application development approaches abound in the software world. However, the evaluation of the existing programming frameworks tend to focus on specific application context.

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closed as off topic by MετάEd, FumbleFingers, Mark Beadles, Jim, kiamlaluno Dec 21 '12 at 5:42

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Off topic (request for rewrite/critique). –  MετάEd Dec 20 '12 at 21:44
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Why do you want to rephrase it? I mean, you could, but what is the reason for wanting to? –  jdstankosky Dec 20 '12 at 21:47
    
@MετάEd What an unseasonably friendly thing to say! Or maybe I mean vice versa. –  tchrist Dec 20 '12 at 21:51
    
Read the FAQ (english.stackexchange.com/faq), read the past Q&A to know what kind of questions are dealt with on ELU. Check out writersSE. –  Kris Dec 21 '12 at 6:29
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1 Answer 1

up vote 3 down vote accepted

Your problem is with including the definite article at the beginning of the second example. Better would be

Application development approaches abound in the software world. However, the evaluation of the existing programming frameworks tend to focus on specific application context.

Arguably, even better would be

Application development approaches abound in the software world; however, evaluation of the existing programming frameworks tends to focus on specific application context.

Notice the second the removed and the switch in number of the verb tend to tends.

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I think we're just getting suckered into providing a proofreading service here. OP is only actually asking about whether it's better to use "While A, B" or "A. However B". While my answer would be "It's just a stylistic choice", I notice you've chosen to cast both your rephrasings using the other option. That's not unreasonable. However, I doubt you actually meant to endorse one at the expense of the other. –  FumbleFingers Dec 20 '12 at 23:05
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