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Is there a word that describes a parent whose child has died?

Along the lines of "orphan", "widow", and "widower", is there a single word for a parent who has lost a child (of any age)?

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Maybe there is no such special word because, until very recent times, almost all parents would fall in that category. – GEdgar Jul 15 '12 at 20:14

3 Answers

I don't think there's a single word on the order of orphan and widow/widower. I would say bereaved parents.

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I too don't believe there is a single English word for having lost a child. There are numerous articles about bereaved parents that begin with this fact. [parenting.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/06/08/describing-grief/] And many organizations for parents who lost a child call them bereaved parents. [bereavedparents.com/] – JLG Mar 27 '12 at 21:17
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+1 "Bereaved parents" would be I believe, the most correct term to call a parent who has lost his child. – Bidella Mar 28 '12 at 0:42

I'm a bereaved parent who wishes there was a term like orphan or widow to describe my status. Some say there is no such title because the death of a child is too awful to put into words. Some say that historically, a child dying was such a common event that it didn't merit a special word. Also, I've heard it said that the passing of a child doesn't affect the societal status of the surviving parent in the way that widow or orphan does.

I'm here to say that it's awful for me to think it's too awful an event to give name to. It happens everyday to countless parents like me, and I get no comfort from the denial. The other idea, that it's so commonplace that there's no need for a name, seems to diminish the monumental impact of the loss of a child. While it's true that children died more often in the past, it's no longer the case today, in the US anyway. I think our language needs to catch up.

As far as the notion of our status in society being unchanged, although we are not orphaned or widowed, we are forever marked. I think the word shadow, is a good descriptor. We are a shadow of our former selves, even as we move on. We will always have the shadow of our departed children. It has the familiar "dow" in it. I'm going to start using it, and hope that others will join me.

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Picking at the Greek words involved:

  • tethlimmenos is bereaved (-menos is the ending for “being in a state of”)
  • and parents are goneis, singular goneas.

The Latin for bereaved is detrudat (which I don’t like), and parent is parens.

I think it would be handy for bereaved parents if on being asked whether they have any children, they could say:

  • I’m a tethlimom. (if a mother)
  • I’m a tethlidad. (if a father)
  • We’re tethligons. (for both)

instead of:

  • I did have a child, but that child died.
  • I did have a son, but he died.
  • I did have a daughter, but she died.

Much less painful.

The two-parent word could be tethligons.

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Welcome to ELU. Nice first post. I’ve taken the liberty to try to reformat your posting, and someone rearrange it, for clarity. If this is not quite what you intended, please feel free to edit it yourself to make it say what you intended. – tchrist Mar 3 at 15:47

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