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I want to say that if someone truly loved you, he would not seek his benefit at the expense of yours.

How can I say that better than I did in the title of this question?

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I'd say "... he would not seek to profit at your expense."

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+1, nice wording! – RiMMER Oct 16 '11 at 1:49

If you want something close to the way you phrased it, try "He would not seek to benefit at your expense."

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The concept identified is that of selflessness.

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"If he truly loved you, he would not assume your subservience."

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