I have heard a couple of times recently the phrase "don't piss on my boots and tell me it's raining", usually in the context of a heated argument so I've hesitated to ask speaker what exactly he meant by it. Can anyone here help?
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It suggests that the person you're upset with is harming you, making an unbelievably brazen claim that they are not, and that you have seen through their meagre attempt at deception.
There are a few variant forms. There's pee versus piss for varying the level of crudity, and even spit to avoid the subject of urine entirely. The thing being urinated (or spat) on can be a boot, shoe, leg, back, face, etc. Some examples:
(from Honey, hush! An Anthology of African-American Women's Humor by Daryl Cumber Dance, 1998, p88)
(from the film The Outlaw Josey Wales, 1976)
(from Alias Big Cherry by Robert H. Adleman, 1973)
(from the play Five on the Black Hand Side by Charlie L. Russell, 1969)
I take the saying as:
Because the "rain" came from YOU, and not from the weather.
There are a few major uses of the phrase Don't piss on my boots and tell me it's raining. The basic idea is that someone just blatantly insulted or wronged another and, when caught, tried to convince people that it was a good thing. This would be akin to stealing money out of a desk drawer and then trying to claim you were going to put it in the bank for them. The thief was caught pissing on someone but didn't own up to doing anything wrong — even worse, the thief tried to play the situation off as a positive act.
The actions here don't need to be covert, either. If I walk up to someone and slap them in the face with the excuse, "Oh, you had a fly on you" they could reasonably respond with, "Don't piss on my boots and tell me its raining." The main purpose of the saying to identify a bad thing as bad and to not dress it up as a good thing.
Likewise, the actions don't need to be intentional. They don't even need to be caused anyone in particular. If someone's lover just left him and a friend tries consoling him by saying, "You were above her anyway" the same response would be appropriate: "Don't piss on my boots and tell me it's raining." In other words, stop telling me a bad thing is a good thing. Just admit it was a bad thing.
It means I can't be so easily fooled
Other similar expressions would include
and many others. Basically I'm not a fool, but the expression has more force if a little crude language is used.
But the force of such expressions relies on both parties understanding what it means. It might have been a deflating experience for the other if you had asked what he meant.
"Don't tell me something that's clearly false and then invent a ridiculous story to back it up."
I always simply took this to mean "Don't lie" or "Don't try to fool me." Even more specifically, "don't try to fool me, damaging me in the process."
protected by RegDwigнt♦ Jul 21 '11 at 11:58
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