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Is there any slang word that describes somebody who doesn't show up when you date him?

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A no-show (if you want to dampen the effect of retelling the tale of being stood up) – kolossus Jul 21 '14 at 5:51
Are you looking for a word to describe the person who didn't show up, or the act of waiting for someone who doesn't show up? – Frank Jul 21 '14 at 5:57
"A slang" is a language. What you are looking for "a slang word", or simply "slang", uncountable, no article. – RegDwigнt Jul 21 '14 at 8:46
Dumped! *baddum-tsh* – David Richerby Jul 21 '14 at 15:13
if he never shows up, you actually haven't dated him yet. – Oldcat Jul 21 '14 at 17:23

5 Answers 5


Although the correct answer for the action is definitely "stand up".

I can't believe it, he stood me up.

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But only for no-show, not stand-up. – bib Jul 21 '14 at 11:11
Only for stand-up, not no-show. – John Peyton Jul 21 '14 at 14:07
This isn't correct, RAY is asking for a slang term for the person, not the action. "He's a stand up" doesn't make any sense. – Little Big Bot Jul 21 '14 at 14:41
Hmm ... he often makes dates and does not show up ... he's a stand-up guy... – GEdgar Jul 21 '14 at 14:50
@GEdgar "Stand-up guy" means that the guy is dependable, reliable, of good character, etc. It's not the kind of guy who'd have stood up his date. – Joshua Taylor Jul 21 '14 at 16:12

The most common slang term I've heard for this is stood up. In 5 stages of dealing with being stood up (CNN), the opening lines are:

Nobody likes to get stood up! But it does happen. And if you date long enough, it's bound to happen. It's so embarrassing. You get left at a restaurant, the dude never shows, the man of your dreams just doesn't call.

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And to derive a noun from that, you can call him either a stand-up (rare, in my experience), a stand-upper, or a stander-upper. All three are quite slangy. – Janus Bahs Jacquet Jul 21 '14 at 8:49
@JanusBahsJacquet I'm okay with the other two, but I wouldn't call him or her a stand-up unless she or he were very funny. – bib Jul 21 '14 at 11:10
@bib I have heard it used to mean someone who stands people up, but only rarely. For some reason, I can't help but think of it as being more habitual, a la “He's such a stand-up, always blowing his friends off when he's supposed to be meeting with them”. (Very different, of course, from calling him a real stand-up kind of guy!) – Janus Bahs Jacquet Jul 21 '14 at 11:12
@JanusBahsJacquet Probably the most common use of stand-up (at least in the US) is to refer to a stand-up comic. – bib Jul 21 '14 at 11:19
I think you'd get some odd looks if you tried using any of the nouns in the first comment (brit here). If someone said "He's a stand-up", first I'd assume a comic, and if that was clearly not the case then I'd assume it was a misuse of the phrase "a stand up guy" (evidently slang) and a stand up guy wouldn't be standing anyone up.. – OGHaza Jul 21 '14 at 11:38

I belive that the correct term here would be flaker.

Someone who does not show up when they had previously stated they will. Also, someone who has no intention of showing up, but acts like they will or want to show up only to mess with your feelings.


Tim is such a flaker. I can't believe that he bailed out the very last minute! I'm definitely not inviting him to hang out next time.


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Calling someone a flake is also appropriate: "Jack is such a flake." – Little Big Bot Jul 21 '14 at 13:32
Please note that quoting text without citing where you’re quoting from is tantamount to plagiarism and will be deleted on sight by the mods. You should add a link to the Urban Dictionary entries you have cited here. – Janus Bahs Jacquet Jul 21 '14 at 15:41
@Little A flake is more general to me (and I see UD agrees): it’s someone who’s just generally unreliable or muddles his way through life in a bit of a wishy-washy, willy-nilly fashion and leads a flaky existence. A flake is quite likely to stand you up, but someone who stands you up is not necessarily a flake. – Janus Bahs Jacquet Jul 21 '14 at 15:45
@JanusBahsJacquet Yeah, that's true, it'd require context. – Little Big Bot Jul 21 '14 at 16:05

To blow somebody off:

to ignore someone or something; to skip an appointment with someone; to not attend something where one is expected. He decided to sleep in and blow this class off. It wasn't right for you to just blow off an old friend the way you did.


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That also means fellatio in BrE; use with caution. – Frank Jul 21 '14 at 5:53
Sure, that is probably the origin of the idiom:)) – Josh61 Jul 21 '14 at 6:24

A slang term for not showing up that my friends and I use is fader.

Fader is a general term and isn’t necessarily related to a date.


Charles didn’t show up again — could he be any more of a fader?

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Is this a commonly used word, or is it something that only you and your friends use? – Doc Jul 21 '14 at 14:21
@Doc It appears in urban dictionary FWIW – Martin Smith Jul 21 '14 at 18:12
I have heard it used outside of my friend group. Mostly in informal settings, but I have also heard it at work (I worked in a relaxed environment). – Rian Mostert Jul 23 '14 at 11:19
@MartinSmith, thank you, I should probably have referenced that to avoid that negative vote. – Rian Mostert Jul 23 '14 at 11:21

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