There is a technique to making vulgar and obscene statements gentle, respectful but yet provocative.
The intention is to create the thunder without the storm. To offend without being offensive. But you can't just build it in one phrase. You have to build up the intensity which you could otherwise do with a single offensive word.
It has come to our attention that Henry Podunk has willfully breached our mutual agreement not to release names of our clients. Normally such breach of trust should involve excremental digestive juices thrown at the offender. However, we shall offer our dear friend Henry Podunk a discount. We will just provide him with a breath of fresh air from each of our rear ends - verbally or literally, that is your choice.
That was an excellent article that she wrote. Her material is solidly provocative. She would throw at you materials that would match the stench of your unprofessionalism. In the case of the Governor's budget for the project, what she threw at him matched the incoming cesspool of our infamous local sewer plant. You could repeat to her my observation about her opinion of the Governor, and I assure you she would not throw anything but hugs and kisses at me.
This is an actual incredulous account of the events yesterday. Believe me, because I assure you with utmost sincerity that you do not qualify for a burger patty from my restroom.
We often wonder the origins of the word quote-unquote suck. Suck what? It is so very suggestive. It is suggesting that someone is sucking on something. What is that thing being sssucked on? Is it your ego, or perhaps, creativity, or even your pro-creativity? Do you have such doubts about your performance in the company? I wish to assure you that you are doing very well in the company and none of your colleagues would desire to suck your pro-creativity. Neither do they desire you to suck theirs.
We often wonder the origins of the word quote-unquote suck. Suck what? It is so very suggestive. It is suggesting that someone is sucking on something. What is that thing being sssucked on? Is it your ego, or perhaps, creativity, or even your pro-creativity? I have a strange and bizarre premonition that this esteemed colleague our ours, currently standing next to us, is about to suck on everyone's pro-creativity to compensate for his level of performance.