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I'm not sure how to punctuate this:

Their movements, quick and effortless; mine, lumbering and heavy.

Maybe I got it right. Any thoughts?

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It might help to see the rest of the sentence or paragraph or what not. –  tchrist Jul 16 '13 at 17:23
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2 Answers

This is correct semantically (and quite nicely written if I do say so myself). If you are looking for an alternative to the semicolon, you might consider an em dash, e.g.:

Their movements, quick and effortless—mine, lumbering and heavy

Em dashes are technically less correct than a semicolon in this situation, but I feel they add a different flavor to the text. Good luck with your writing!

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Their movements, quick and effortless; mine, lumbering and heavy.

Is not a sentence. I think it context might have been something like this:

We we hiking uphill: their movements, quick and effortless; mine, lumbering and heavy.

or better,

We we hiking uphill: their movements were quick and effortless, mine*,* lumbering and heavy.

Either way, it's a fragment.

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I think you meant ‘we were’ in both your examples. But other than that, agreed. Nothing wrong with a good fragment, of course, in the right circumstances. –  Janus Bahs Jacquet Jul 16 '13 at 18:55
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